humor is a skill that many people who are good at speaking are not good at, let alone teaching humor, you can find humor teaching on the Internet b>, it’s nothing more than an old-fashioned example of Churchill, Reagan, etc. After reading it, you have learned a few hardcore jokes to broaden your knowledge, but it still doesn’t help your sense of humor at all.
In fact, this article has been conceived by Mr.P for a long time. At first, I couldn’t find a good starting point to talk about building a sense of humor. However, in my own training course recently, I just witnessed a trainee change from dullness to humor. The process, let me catch a clue to become humorous.
This article will talk about humor from my experience and a few popular movies, and I will analyze it for you:
- Humor isn’t born, it’s learned
- A sense of humor is only the result of a good sense of language
- How to handle and use humorous reversal and timing
Would you like to become a humorous person too? Let’s chat together.
The premise of humor
When I started to write about this topic, I asked a lot of friends for their opinions. I asked them what they think is humor, how to show it, and how to be a humorous person. One of them gave me The answer is very special, let’s call her Miss S first, we said this at the time:
“Hey, S, I want to ask you a question, what kind of person do you think can be called humor?”
“Hah…, your question is too difficult to answer… Let me think about it.”
After three minutes of contemplation, she replied:
“I think humorous words can make people smile without offending each other. Then I think there should be no so-called humorous person, everyone has their own humor.”
“Huh? You’re saying that everyone has a certain level of humor, and maybe you can understand someone’s humor, but I don’t necessarily understand someone’s humor, right?”
“Well, that’s what I meant.”
After the conversation with S, I opened the batch and browsed through a few familiar versions, and suddenly found one thing:
“The humor of the villagers can only be understood by the villagers.”
Just like the old jokes my dad told I never laughed, humor itself is very social, even if the high-end humor can make 80% of people smile, it is very amazing, so it is necessary to use ” Humor has a major premise:
- You want to make sure the other person understands what you’re talking about
The difference between funny, funny and humorous
Let me take my own example. Mr.P watched the movie Big Buddha Plath under the introduction of a friend a while ago. There is a plot in which boss Kevin killed people and hid them in the big Buddha statue. And Kevin also found out that his guard Dried Dried Vegetables knew about it, so Kevin threatened Dried Dried Dried Vegetables with a hint. He said to Dried Dried Vegetables:
“The most important thing for a person is to have peace.”
Translated into the vernacular, it means that if you talk about this, then you may not be so “peaceful”.
After watching the movie, we went to a nearby restaurant to eat and chat. He told me that he had a bad relationship with the supervisor recently, and the supervisor intentionally wanted him to retreat.
When he frowned deeply in distress, I said to him:
“Actually, you still have a way to go. Next Monday morning, you can knock on the supervisor’s door. I’ll help you figure out the lines!”
“Um…?” He looked up at me, expecting that I would say something big,
I imitated Kevin’s tone and said to him: “You just need to tell your supervisor softly that the most important thing for people is to be safe, and that’s fine.”
After a second, we both laughed, and I used the film’s dialogue to calm his irritability, and for a moment his brows weren’t so wrinkled, that’s when I started giving him some advice, telling him that if I were him, I would How to deal with the relationship with the supervisor.
Of course, humor is not just for boys. I have also met girls who are very humorous, and even made me feel that I was in a match and was defeated by her.
Here’s how it all started, on my first date with her, I opened up on a topic I talk about a lot:
Me: “If you had to choose a number from 1 to 10, which number would you choose now?”
She: “3”
Me: “Oh, 3 is my lucky number, why would you want to pick 3?”
She: “Intuition, then you ask me what this is for?”
Me: “Cough cough…, in fact, everyone has a reason when they choose numbers. 3 is a very delicate number. It is just the opposite of the lucky number 7, and it is also less than the ominous number 4 of the Chinese. 1, so those who choose 3 are in good luck.”
She: “Really? What’s the basis for this?”
Me: “Personal inspiration, no scientific basis, hahaha, just a feeling.”
If you are good at chatting, you will know that the point of the above paragraph is not whether it is accurate or not. The topic itself is just a stepping stone. The real key is whether you can talk about the topic vividly.
According to the different reactions of different people, sometimes I will pretend to be serious about the analysis, but in the end let him know that I am just teasing him, and sometimes I will take advantage of the other party. There are hundreds of different combinations, it depends How do you show the flexibility of the topic.
On our second date, we talked about past relationships, and she asked me:
“So how many girlfriends have you had?”
“Well… if it is really hard to remember, there are three appointments, less than you think, right!”
“Do you mean three terms? I remember someone told me before that 3 is a very delicate number, it is the opposite of the lucky number 7, and it is also 1 less than the ominous Chinese number 4, so 3 is a lucky number Numbers.”
When she was halfway through speaking, she actually started laughing, and I laughed too. Who would have thought that the topic that I used to use in the past was now used by girls to fight against the army?
And this is actually a way of presenting humor, and it is also the theme I want to talk about today. Humor is not called humor to make things interesting. For Mr.P, funny, funny, and humor are completely different.
The following are my views on these three terms, to clarify a little:
Funny refers to making people laugh through exaggerated expressions, body movements and reactions. The word funny has a bit of a clown element. Most of the comedians we see on variety shows belong to this type.
Funny, refers to a way of description, and the laying out of the story, which can tell the ordinary things wonderfully. The biggest difference between funny and funny lies in the degree of exaggeration. If you pursue fun too much, there is a risk of becoming funny.
Humor refers to the ability to make the other party smile through a sentence, especially when comforting and caring for the other party, or dealing with a crisis.
And today’s topic of discussion is more detailed passive humor, especially those teasing and teasing you come at you.
Four keys to humor
To give you a better idea of how humor is used, let’s first dissect it and see what it takes to have a good humor:
I. Timing
The best time to use humor, I think, is passive. When the other party clearly wants to stab you and embarrass you, you can fight back in front of everyone in a way that doesn’t offend the other party and secretly steps on the other party’s foot. This kind of humor is OK. Make everyone smile and win everyone’s respect.
2. Materials
Everyone present can understand it. This is the premise I mentioned at the beginning, and it is best to use the material in this conversation. When you can directly use this material to humor everyone, it will undoubtedly show you more. The humour is great.
If you are chatting one-on-one, you must also keep this principle in mind. If the other party is an anime fan and has seen Gintama, then Armstrong’s whirlwind jet Armstrong cannon is a very suitable humorous stalk. If the object of the conversation is a seventh grader who grew up watching TV, then Stephen Chow’s meme will also be a good material.
In short, the more powerful you are when you use material that is more private and understood by both of you.
Why do you say that?
Because even if there are many people chatting, the other party will know that you are deliberately trying to tell him, and this private and targeted humor will greatly bring the two of you together and deepen the relationship. That’s all.
Three, presentation and tone
When humor is about to appear, you will find one thing, the humorist does not use exaggerated body language or tone, he will lower the pitch, speak slower, or even pause for a while.
The reason for doing this is to reverse the prelude and recapture the audience’s attention.
Just imagine, when you were personally attacked by someone, and it was your turn to speak again, people expected you to panic or become angry, but your face was full of confidence and calmly scanning the audience, and Speaking in a steady tone is a very noticeable response in itself.
(Then how to maintain a confident aura when being teased? That is
Four, language sense (Fenglin volcano)
In my designed Communication Power system, I will Speaking is divided into four major systems of Fenglin and Huoyuan. If you explain it in a simple way, it is sense of language. To achieve humor, it comes from your sense of language. Take control.
Then what is the sense of language? It’s like saying:
- What topic should I take now?
- Is the person asking casually or wanting to know more?
- I know if I say that, will he make any impression?
- When should I talk to him about a relationship?
- Will I hit him with a joke like that?
- What’s the best thing I should talk about to build a relationship with him?
The above problems are difficult for many people when chatting, so some people get stuck in the middle of the chat, and some people are very good at chatting but can’t communicate with others, but in fact, the real core problem lies in
b>Language sense.
A lot of people are talking about “getting right“, or “social intuition“, etc., to mean the same thing.
The reason why the sense of humor cannot be learned in a short period of time is because the sense of humor comes from a skilled sense of language. The above-mentioned materials, timing, presentation and tone are actually only the externalization of the mastery of the sense of language.
There are two ways to exercise the sense of language. One is through a lot of practical exercises. If you have always been engaged in business work like Mr.P, then you will have a higher possibility of mastering the sense of language faster. It is to learn language sense through a systematic method, which is also the original intention of my design of Fenglin-Huanhuan communication method.
Fenglinhuo is a systematic method to exercise the sense of language. Only by mastering the sense of language can you develop your personal style of speaking, and the sense of humor will be naturally established after the personal style is manifested.
